Diwali update

Stuck in hostel...Most of the hostlers have left for their homes, all set to celebrate Diwali with their dear ones..Circumstances have left a few like me helpless here in the hostel.. Away from dear ones..With just the phones in our hand to look out for calls from loved ones to share their happiness:)

Happy Diwali friends .... May this Diwali lighten up your life :)

Missing you so much – My Love!!!!

Yet another Sunday… FB flooded with online friends.. Still confused whom to ping.. whom to have a chat with…

But in spite of all these distractions, I am thinking of you and you alone… No one makes me feel the same way as you do.. Some things in life can’t be replaced.. And you are irreplaceable in my life…

I can’t express how much I miss you today and I really wish to be near you at the earliest…

I don’t know whether you remember, I met you first 4 years back in Kerala. At the first sight, I knew, we were connected. I could feel it. And I thank god for gifting me that moment. Since then, there hasn’t been a day in my life that I haven’t thought about you and there may not be any going forward. You are the best thing that ever happened in my life and I promise you I won’t let you go. I was lucky enough to have everything go my way and to get something going between us at the earliest..

I can’t forget the days I spent with you… After the first meet, I know we had minimal chances to spent time together. In fact, we have spent very little time together till date… Somehow or the other we always ended up in two distant places, thanks to me and my terrific fateL Still despite the long distances that separated us, you have always been there for me. You have given me support and strength always and whenever I felt down, you have given me the strength and courage to rise above it.. But today, I feel so tired.. More tired than ever. I just wish to reach you as soon as I can…and relive those moments we had together…

I miss the long outings with you…In fact, last year was the best in my life.. Somehow I was able to make it back to you.. So much time to spend with you…The chats and hang outs.. Memorable weekends…and the journeys and the fun…I always wanted to be there for you though I was able to do that only a few times in my life…The few months with you last year was the best in my life till date and I really wish to create a lot many moments worth remembrance with you… Many a time I have felt that you complete me… And today I feel so incomplete… Why oh why are you not here??

I know your stint with me has not been so fruitful all along… there was always this distance problem between us.. You somewhere and me somewhere else.. And then the horrific road accident that we had last year.. I never wanted to hurt you.. It was all my fault.. I did not keep enough attention on the road which caused the accident.. That was one of the worst nights of my life. I could feel that I had lost control.. And before I could do anything I found myself flung off in the air doing a somersault.. I never knew that I could do a somersault till then and I don’t think I can do it without external help again.. Yes I was injured badly and I was in real pain… But what really hurt me was your condition.. When I landed on ground, flat on my back, I could see you still rolling along having bruises all over you.. I don’t know how I could suppress my pain.. I hated me a lot that moment for hurting you.. How could I let this happen to you? I could just stand up and make it to you.. You were silent.. I could not control my tears seeing the bruises on your body.. I was least concerned about my injury. In fact I did not even notice that my hands and legs were bleeding. It was 9.30 at night and I stood there helpless on the NH 47 looking for possible help. It took half an hour on that dreaded night before I could find some helping hands. Thanks to two people who stopped by to help. I don’t remember their names though they had told me. All I wanted to was to take you home safely and to get you healed… I am so sorry for all that.. I know it took you some time to recover… But post recovery I felt you more stunning than ever… I realized how much I wanted you that day.. And I had decided not to leave you alone after that..

Alas! Some stupid decisions and here I am at Haryana – again away from you.. I know you would be a bit frustrated with me by now.. One year since then…and today I feel so tired, as I mentioned, of this hide and seek game.. I just want to let you know that I need you always with me.. Situations and some of my own stupidity kept you away from me.. I promise that it won’t happen again and that I will make it back to you at the earliest..

Can’t wait to reach you… feel you… kiss you…. And set out for another long trip with you…I just can’t wait to feel myself complete once again…to feel the rush of adrenaline in me.. and to feel alive once again, my dearest RTR-160 AB8475….

So true..

If you really want to do something you will find a way..and if you don't u will find an excuse

It hurts when you find out that only excuses are put in front of you rather than a genuine effort because then there was no intention or desire to do that thing..and in case the failure comes after a genuinely made effort, you should feel better as the desire was always there and the disposal was done rather by god and fate rather than us...

Good morning :)

Success and failure

Success is a feeling to be shared and enjoyed in a group..there may be many claimants for the same...but always remember..there won't be anyone to share your failure..so make sure that each step in life is taken carefully...more importantly to avoid failures...so that you don 't end up lonely struggling to accept failure as the reality..

Gaining admiration....

There is a thin line of difference between arrogance and confidence..The people who manage to stay in the right side are widely appreciated and the others are loathed by all..A person turns a gem when he is ready to accept his failures and work towards betterment rather than trying to alter the result through unfair means...We prefer to call such people 'cunning' to 'intelligent'..

A visit to the 'Start'...

26th was a wonderful day...
Life was good at start...Really good..no words to describe...I used to feel like a prince roaming around in my area with my father and brother...I can still feel that Kinetic honda..No Hayabusa would have given me a greater feel than that...I miss all those good moments..The 'Friday' visits to bookshops..buying the shop out...The Saturday trips to cousins' place...and the return trips on Sundays with guaranteed buys of ice-creams and chocolates..The Kinetic honda felt like a limousine for the four of us including my mother...so spacious it was...And wonderful life was..No pressure..no responsibility..I used to think how lucky I was...The people around were wonderful...
As always things changed..Something so so unexpected happened that we had to shift..The shift was meant to bring us more happiness..It never did though...I left the wonderful place..The people around whom I had thought to be a part of my life all the way became just part of my memories..I never wanted to leave but I had to..I left behind all those happiest days of my life...
I miss my stay at Kundara...I miss the people..place and shops there..I miss my old schools..I miss everything..
I have gone once or twice to visit my old place..I feel sad seeing the place..Its so nostalgic..and watching the house from outside knowing that you can't rush in like before hurts..
Went for a marriage on 26th..Got to see some people who had made my childhood memorable..including the one getting married...Though I could find many familiar faces, Wasn't able to make out all of them...Just a flash of memories..some looked the same..some so different..The funny fact is that no one recognized me..was expected..They may have seen me last as a kid 14 years back..The ones who recognized had the 'Where in the hell were you all these days' look on them..Still could not meet some whom I wanted to meet..It was good to be there with my brother and mother..My brothers memories may not be sharp as mine because he was too small when we left..still he too would have felt the loss we made by leaving the place..The place has changed a lot since those days...I could hardly recognize the way to my old house...Everything together made me feel a bit strange...Was the feeling good or bad..I really don't know..Was the happiness in being there again or the sadness about the loss I made by not being there prominent..Cant really make out..

A thought...

Reasoning can vary from person to person..A good enough rational reason may not make sense at all to the other...and many a time it can create problems in relationships and friendships...I don't know what it takes to bring in perfect understanding among all...And the worst is the fact that no one openly criticizes these days..everyone keeps everything in mind..making things much more difficult...
I am really sorry in case I have hurt anyone in one way or the other...May be I did..but I just wanted to say nothing was intentional..Each and everything I did was with the belief that I was doing something good if not great..:)
I have tried as far as possible to stay away from spaces where I am not needed or where I am a potential problem maker...I always do that..but most of the times everyone involved fails to understand..Hope someday everyone will understand...I never wanted to hurt anyone..I never wanted to be cruel to anyone..I never wanted to lie..May be at times I have hurt people..I want each and everyone of them to understand that I feel more hurt in those situations....Wish everyone thought a bit more...thought a bit more on the other's situation before putting on a blame...